• i weigh 223 pounds
  • this is 42 pounds less than i weighed a year ago
  • i ate better today
  • i had no soda
  • i did not snack
  • i only had one cup of coffee today
  • i exercised for 34 minutes
  • i did 14 modified push ups
why does this matter? read on...

WOW. what a day. holy cow am i sore. so yeah. this last year i dropped 42 pounds. i refused to have any physical activity in my life. why you ask? because it hurt. because i was scared. because i couldn't breath. because i was full of excuses. and then there was that whole cross country move thing. i found some happiness. but still lacking something.

now don't get all excited. i'm not jumping on a bandwagon to get healthier because it's a new year. i don't consider any of this a resolution. nope. being fit and being healthy is needed. it's required in order to live in bend, oregon. why? have you SEEN bend, oregon? i'm missing out on my city if i can't be out and be active and experiencing bend, oregon. period. hands down.

oh yeah, but then there's the whole health thing. i have grave's disease. i have no thyroid, therefore metabolism and i don't get along. i have fibromyalgia. i have asthma. among many other things i won't bore you with. but what i have learned? i refuse to allow any of these things to define me. i never have. i keep a sense of humor about me. i can only survive this shit with humor.

so, i'm doing life. it's a 12 week challenge. watch ben's video first. i was inspired by ben. i hope you will be too. and maybe join me, follow me, encourage me. the challenges are listed on the forums, you've got to register, pay 10 bucks that helps with sending prizes to the weekly challenge winners. and do life damnit. it's that easy.

today? i focused on eating well, dropped the soda, added in water, and stayed moving almost all. day. long. i did 14 push ups. 14 more than i did yesterday. granted, they were modified, and probably very half-assed, but i did the best with what i have, and it's a start. i did this via the biggest loser workout plan on my kinect. i am hurting to the CORE. and i only worked out 34 minutes today. i put away all christmas decor today. i did laundry, i cleaned house, i grocery shopped. i. am. tired.

check back. i'm blogging about it daily.

peace and be good.


OLW - 2012

many of you reading are familiar with Ali Edwards One Little Word project that she sponsors every year. while i have, with best intentions, taken the time to seek a word each year, i've failed miserably at embracing the word, owning the word, and really making it resonate in my daily life. last year, i made strides, and chose the word MORE. it meant a great deal to me.

i can humbly admit, i did a great deal MORE last year than ever before. we moved cross country for crying out loud! how much MORE can you ask for? i got rid of MORE negative energy than ever. i embraced MORE, i grew MORE emotionally. i learned to love MORE of me, and i physically lost MORE of me. a considerable amount MORE. i played MORE. i loved MORE. i said no, MORE. you get the idea.

but the end of the year, left me wanting MORE. i wanted to feel like, at the end of the year, i had completed MORE. the year left me with many started projects, but not all of them were actually finished. this frustrated me. my mind was whirling creatively, from the end of June through December. living in Bend more or less, created a creative fire in my i'd not felt in a very long time. i pretty much gave up on my crafting in 2011. i didn't do MORE or nearly enough of it. that hurt, as it's a big part of life that defines me. that makes me happy. that fuels me to be a better me.

moving cross country is no east feat. and you are constantly in some stage of creation when you do something so huge. you create a plan. you create a new life. you create a new home. you create new friendships. you create a new you. it's a clean slate i think. and it's the last time i do this. we moved here with intention to create roots. as i thought about all of this, i realized create was not just in a paper and glue sense, but moved me like a verb moves a sentence. i wanted MORE out of 2012. but i realized that in order to have MORE, i needed to CREATE it.

so while i felt like CREATE was a sophomoric attempt, initially, at participating in yet one more challenge i probably won't follow through on the entire year, it hit me... this word chose me this year. which i found funny, as i read more and more blogs this week about OLW... many - scratch that - countless women have stated their word chose them for one reason or another. hmmmm... there's a trend here. i want to CREATE more of me this year. and i feel more empowered and encouraged to do so than ever this year.

so - yup - you guessed it, my OLW this year is CREATE.
  • CREATE more - in the literal sense
  • CREATE a home worth loving
  • CREATE a new life
  • CREATE new friendships
  • CREATE new routines
  • CREATE time for me
  • CREATE more time for play
  • CREATE a body that is no longer rifled with pain and distress
  • CREATE more words
  • CREATE progress on my 38 @ 38 list (i will blog about that soon!)
  • CREATE a plan
  • CREATE better food
  • CREATE more healthy routines
  • and on and on and on.... CREATE
it fits. and i'm owning it. and putting it out into the universe, because as i tell my best friend, "you've put it out into the universe, so shall it be." in an effort to own it, i've taken this week off from work. starting the new year by CREATING organization and structure in my home office/studio space. reinventing the space i work in and spend most of my time in, since i work from home, is crucial to my well being - so that is where you will find me this week. i'm sure that will allow me to CREATE more consistent blogging thoughts as well.

go on. create with me.