7.23.2007

....that....woman....



See this sweet, innocent face? So pure and innocent? YEAH. check that thought. this child has entered.. that's right, people. the terrible effin twos! I actually called my mother from the parking lot of target saturday after this sweet and innocent being had a complete meltdown that lasted from the pharmacy all the way out to the car, and said, "ok, mother, so tell me... at what age is it again safe to take children into public?"

i always used to comment, when i was young, single, un-mothered.. if you will.. about "those women". you know you all did it. "why on earth would that woman bring her child out if they are tired/cranky.miserable..." etc etc. you KNOW you did it. i KNOW i did it. and i solemnly swore to my mother... "i will NEVER be that woman". well, ladies, the jig is up. you don't purposely become THAT woman. it just happens. it happens when you least expect it. and you realize as you are pouring sweat down your forehead, standing at the pharmacy counter, picking up your anti-anxiety medication, that you are having an anxiety attack right then and there because a two year old little being has ultimately become possessed by some force stronger than you know.. called THE TEMPER TANTRUM.

i became that woman. people made comments to me as i passed. people said things to me in the parking lot, as though they had any idea what i as going through? "oh, looks like the little princess is tired!" - OR - "oh look at that little cutie.. she must be just having a bad day!".. NO!!! I say.. she's having a bad WEEK!!!! I didn't just say this.. in retrospect, i think i yelled this. i was that woman. CRAZY. DISTURBED. wondering.. how in the HELL did I get here? no one prepared me for this. this wasn't in the countless books i read.

i don't know how to deal with this. other than leave her home. all the time. do my errands between the hours of 8 and 10pm... thank GOD target is open that late and that my grocery store is open 24/7. i guess it too shall pass. as i write, i tend to dramatize it a little for writings sake... no i don't... what the eff am i thinking? it really happened like that. i then remarked to my husband this weekend... how do i cope with this? i'm not cut out for this. i don't have the skills. is this something i can learn? there is no reasoning with a force stronger than nature. this child has a temper like fire. and i've been hit, kicked, slapped.. you name it. yes. she's two.

so, oh great mothering reader presence. teach me. drop your words of wisdom. tell your friends... one of us is sinking, and she needs a life raft... ME! (really, i love my girl.. and life with her is more grand than i ever dreamed...i just can't skip a dose or two of the anxiety meds...hahahhaha)

have a SUPER monday. i have a new outlook for this week... and am going to approach the child like i approach work... i have to learn to be more proactive and keep her occupied enough that she won't have time to have a tantrum... yeah. good luck with that.

7 comments:

Melonie said...

ROFLMBO Shelly! See I can laugh because mine are now 7 and 4! Trust me though I've been there. My nephew is right now entering the terrible 2's and they are NOT pretty. Just stay strong and the key word is CONSISTENCY. She'll soon learn that Mommy doesn't cave to those tantrums. (((HUGS))) You're gonna need em! There's more where that one came from...but as she closes in on 3 you will see a wonderful being immerge. Promise!

Cheryl said...

Oh Shelley , I so wish I lived nearby I would mind her for you while you shopped and scrapped all day !!!
I agree with the consistency bit that Melonie mentioned.. so true!

Tricia said...

HUGS SHELLEY!!! DD skipped the TTwo's and she had the TThree's!!! YIKES!! She hindered on that fine line of really knowing right from wrong and she's so mature beyond her years....I felt just like you; only I am a spanker at times, but when she has been all out CRAZY...what's the point right? It's only going to make it worse!

So breath deep my friend, I am sure she'll have another, and you will SURVIVE!!! Hear that song yet in your head???!!!?? Even though DD is almost 5, she still has her moments, as she is a TRUE drama queen from head to toe!

HUGS AGAIN FRIEND!!

Anonymous said...

Well consistency is the key and letting her know what will happen if and when she throws another tatrum. In a quiet and calm moment , explain what you will do - and then do it. I also found rewards for good behavior are also effective. And it is worth reminding her everytime you go out what you expect and what will happen if you don't get the behavior you want. Try not to yell or overreact. Just stay calm and follow through. - That's the best I have to offer.
Bon Bon

Gigi said...

Oh Shelley, I don't know what other advice to offer you that hasn't already been said. I have been there and have wanted to die of embarrassment. It's exhausting to be a mothere during the hard times but it will get better, that I promise you.

Lisamariemlt said...

Hugs and giggles
sorry but true I did giggle
only because your words convey so much of prob what alot of mothers have gone through at one time or another

Taylor was in Walmart and she threw her first and only
I picked her up
carried her sideways = so she couldn't hit kick or scream
and put her smack down in her car seat in the van
shut the door
and stood outside it starring in at her
when she was done
I calmly said
well
now that you have finished
we ARE going to finish shopping
you will not get a thing and if you do that again you will NEVER get a thing
well I was lucky
we went back in and she never moved in her buggy seat
when we left
she sniffled
and said sorry
I said
in my meanest mommy voice
just remember
I say what I mean and mean what I say
YOU EVER DO THAT AGAIN AND I WILL NEVER EVER BUY YOU ANOTHER THING
and well
touch wood
she has always been so good

everything is a stage
and every stage only lasts for so long
keep smiling
and being you
hugs

Gina said...

Was that MY child you had with you? I swear it was me and Trinity you were talking about. Except that I usually glare at people when they call her a princess having a bad day. LOL

 
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