i am trying to rid myself of it. emotionally, physically, mentally. it can creep up on you and get inside.. and you've no way of letting go!

confused? in the words of my honorary nephew, Noah.. "let me break it down for ya..."

YOU are the only one that can control your own happiness. I have learned this the hard way. it is not my friends that control it. it is not my husband. it certainly is not my coworkers. IT'S ME!!!

When I surround myself with toxins.. food, people, situations, i tend to let it grab hold of me, and then have trouble letting it go. i deal with this on a daily basis with work, mental.. which then i attack myself physically, food... and you see how the circle goes.

so, this year, i've come to a better place. for the first time in a LONG time. i am in control. i'm not letting the personalities get to me. everyone is in charge of their own happiness. i am not the keeper of anyone's but my own. i've been in a good place, so far this year. good things are happening. and i am finally learning to pay it forward. my new motto for the year.

so, i really have no earthly idea where this deep waxing philosophical me came from. but put that in your pipe and smoke it.

one of my FAV sites had this quote today.. .maybe that's what spurred it on...

"Cherish forever what makes you unique, 'cuz you're really a yawn if it goes!"-----Bette Midler

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